COOL SCARLETT TURNS 25

Nerdy or a sexy femme fatale, Scarlett Johansson (New York, november, 22 ,1984) is no doubt one of the biggest stars of this decade. She just turned 25 and have more then thirty films in her CV.

Woody Allen, Sofia Coppola, the Coen brothers, Brian De Palma, Christopher Nolan, Redford, errrh...Michael Bay , among others directors liked her enough to cast her in their movies (and i got the feeling that there are more coming).

I don't always like her because sometimes she seems to be a bit dumb. But she has been in many movies i enjoyed and i have to accept that when the camera loves her, she's hard to ignore. Quite hard.

I remember, when many years ago, Letterman laughed at her because she called Robert Redford simply "Robert". Today he wouldn't.

So without further ado i give you some pictures of her i like enough to place them here, on the walls of Guelyland.

Just one more! Without the Hollywood glamour (or a top photographer).

And just a piece of trivia for those who made it this long, okay? Her height. She is not too tall 5'3'' (1.60 cm)

ALBUM: LA NATURALEZA Y EL HOMBRE (NAVARRETE)

De Editorial Navarrete, 1973. Cuatrocientas figuritas.

Siempre me llamaron la atención las ilustraciones de este álbum algunas como la de el león y el chimpancé, muy realistas. Otras en cambio medio raras y hasta feas o con rostro casi humanizados.

Y yo le tengo mucho cariño a este álbum. Que a mis siete u ocho años de edad parecía la suma y compendio del conocimiento: animales (separados por clase o habitat), vegetales, minerales, anatomía (muy útil a la hora de las tareas de colegio), inventos, razas, leyes de física, geología,

viviendas ,transportes, etc. Aun me acuerdo al ver algunos cromos, las circunstancias en que los conseguí: en los recreos del colegio , con mis primos .

Bueno y como siempre acá les dejo algunas páginas selectas para los que se acuerdan o tienen curiosidad por este bonito álbum.

Y si hay alguna figura o página que quieran ver en detalle. Sólo díganme cual, que se las subo.

LOS DIEZ PEORES PASAJES BÍBLICOS : THE TEN WORST VERSES IN THE BIBLE

En ingles y en español.

These are apparently the ten worst verses in the bible:

"I do not permit a woman to teach or to have authority over a man. She must be quiet." (1 Timothy 2:12)

"Go, now, attack Amalek, and deal with him and all that he has under the ban. Do not spare him, but kill men and women, children and infants, oxen and sheep, camels and asses." (1 Samuel 15:3)

"You shall not let a sorceress live." (Exodus 22:18)

"Happy those who seize your children and smash them against a rock." (Psalm 137:9)

"When the men would not listen to his host, the husband seized his concubine and thrust her outside to them. They had relations with her and abused her all night until the following dawn, when they let her go. Then at daybreak the woman came and collapsed at the entrance of the house in which her husband was a guest, where she lay until the morning. When her husband rose that day and opened the door of the house to start out again on his journey, there lay the woman, his concubine, at the entrance of the house with her hands on the threshold. He said to her, 'Come, let us go'; but there was no answer. So the man placed her on an ass and started out again for home." (Judges 19:25-28)

"And the males likewise gave up natural relations with females and burned with lust for one another. Males did shameful things with males and thus received in their own persons the due penalty for their perversity." (Romans 1:27)

"Jephthah made a vow to the Lord. 'If you deliver the Ammonites into my power,' he said, 'whoever comes out of the doors of my house to meet me when I return in triumph from the Ammonites shall belong to the Lord. I shall offer him up as a holocaust.' ... When Jephthah returned to his house in Mizpah, it was his daughter who came forth, playing the tambourines and dancing. She was an only child: he had neither son nor daughter besides her. When he saw her, he rent his garments and said, 'Alas, daughter, you have struck me down and brought calamity upon me. For I have made a vow to the Lord and I cannot retract'." (Judges 11:30-1, 34-5)

"Then God said: 'Take your son Isaac, your only one, whom you love, and go to the land of Moriah. There you shall offer him up as a holocaust on a height that I will point out to you'."(Genesis 22:2)

"Wives should be subordinate to their husbands as to the Lord." (Ephesians 5:22)

"Slaves, be subject to your masters with all reverence, not only to those who are good and equitable but also to those who are perverse." (1 Peter 2:18)

Y aquí la version en español. Ustedes chequeen sus propias biblias:

Mujeres no pueden enseñar en la iglesia (1 Tim. 2:12).

Samuel manda a destruir completamente a los amalecitas (1 Sam. 15:3).

El mandamiento de Moisés que no se le deje vivir a una hechicera (Ex. 22:18).

El final de Salmo 137 en donde de habla de estrellar los niños del enemigo contra las rocas.

El violación y asesinato de una concubina (Jueces 19:25-28).

La condenación de homosexualidad (Romanos 1:27).

La promesa de Jefté que le llevó a matar a su hija (Jueces 11).

El comando de sacrificar a Isaac (Génesis 22:2).

La instrucción a esposas a someterse a sus esposos (Efesios 5:22).

La instrucción a esclavos a someterse a sus amos (1 Pedro 2:18).

BEFORE COLUMBUS, KING ABUBAKARI II ?

Maybe, Mansa (King) Abubakari II of Mali, a black muslim, sailed from West Africa to northeastern South America almost two hundred years before Columbus. King Abubakari, after learning from arab scholars that there were lands on the west side of the Atlantic, became obsessed with the idea of extending his kingdom into these Terra Incognita. Abdicated his throne and went to his adventure never coming back. Mobilizing resources of his empire to hire arab shipbuilders from Lake Chad to build a fleet, the king and his crew sailed down the Senegal river and across the Atlantic in 1311. Aparently he sighted the north coast of South America but landed first in Panama. Supposedly, king Abubakari II and his entourage travelled south from Panama and settled in the Inca Empire.

Musa Mansa

The great Musa Mansa, the succesor or Abubakari II is the original source of this history, while describing to the governor of Cairo in 1324 (back from his fabulous pilgrimage to Mecca) as recorded by historian Chihab al-Umari (Damascus, 1300-1384) who was there few years after the visit of the wealthy king. He wrote:

The ruler who preceded me did not believe that it was impossible to reach the extremity of the ocean that encircles the earth (meaning the Atlantic): he wanted to reach that (end) and was determined to pursue his plan. So he equipped two hundred boats full of men, and many others full of gold, water and provisions sufficient for several years. He ordered the captain not to return until they had reached the other end of the ocean, or until he had exhausted the provisions and water. So they set out on their journey. They were absent for a long period, and, at last just one boat returned. When questioned the captain replied: 'O Prince, we navigated for a long period, until we saw in the midst of the ocean a great river which flowing massively. My boat was the last one; others were ahead of me, and they were drowned in the great whirlpool and never came out again. I sailed back to escape this current.' But the Sultan would not believe him. He ordered two thousand boats to be equipped for him and his men, and one thousand more for water and provisions. Then he conferred the regency on me for the term of his absence, and departed with his men, never to return nor to give a sign of life.

The historian, Ivan van Sertima (Guyana, 1935-2009) in his book They Came Before Columbus (Random House,1976) was one of the suporters of this interesting theory.

SWEET DREAMS...

Wherever you are, whoever you might be.

May the night give you the rest you deserve

so you can gain strenght for the next day of your life.

Have lucid dreams that will enlight you.

Have crazy dreams that will inspire you.

Have sweet dreams that will make you wake up happy.

Have an exciting nightmare that will make you love your daily life.

Dream that you are your heroe's best friend.

Dream with that loved one that is away from you.

Every night of every day, dream your dreams and, then in the morning,

make them real or write them down so you will remember them in case they never happen.

Because dreams are what you already have and you are made of.

Sweet dreams, little girl , big man, poor woman, scared boy, loyal dog, fellow guelylander, pretty people, unknown friend, misunderstood loner, good person, bad person, or in between, everybody,

everywhere, everytime...

GUELYLANDSONG #4: LA NUEVA YMA SUMAC

Hace unos minutos acabo de descubrir este grupo catalán que canta esta versión en japonés (el vocalista es Imai de The Aprils) que con un estilo de Power Puff Girls nos entregan esta divertida canción llamada La nueva Yma Sumac (del LP la Revolución Sexual,2007).

Les dejo también la versión es español. Letra y música de Guille Milkyway.

Dices que te sientes invencible.
que haces cosas increíbles, amor,
que eres Ultraman.

Dices que parezco desganado,
que mi fuerza se ha agotado,
que soy un triste SuperMan.

Hablas de remedios sorprendentes,
de los entresijos de la mente.
Tu voz se proyecta, el futuro se acerca.

Y ya voy, ha llegado el momento
de acabar con mi corazón.
Necesito fulminar de raíz el dolor,
y cambiar lo que siento
y aprender a volar hacia el sol.
He pasado tanto frío que ahora yo ...

Sé que lograré ser invencible
y haré cosas increíbles,
seré casi, casi Ultraman.

Compraré clorato de potasa,
superaré las seis octavas,
seré la nueva Yma Sumac.

Vamos juntos a asombrar al mundo,
somos poderosos, te lo juro.
Mi voz se proyecta, el futuro se acerca.

Y ya voy, ha llegado el momento
de acabar con mi corazón.
Necesito fulminar de raíz el dolor,
y cambiar lo que siento
y aprender a volar hacia el sol.
He pasado tanto frío que quiero calor.

No consigo recordar cuando todo iba mal,
hace tiempo que las flores son de plástico.
Y es posible que al final mis poderes me hagan ganar.
Tu voz se proyecta, el futuro se acerca.

Y ya voy, ha llegado el momento
de acabar con mi corazón.
Necesito fulminar de raíz el dolor,
y cambiar lo que siento
y aprender a volar hacia el sol.
He pasado tanto frío que quiero,
que quiero tener tu calor.

El grupo compuesto por cinco chicos y chicas cantan sospechosamente mal en vivo por lo que algunos mas que sospechan que tan solo son la imagen del grupo y que todo es sólo Guille (encima los miembros del grupo se autodenominan androides). En un principio créo que los integrantes de la banda no salian sinó en dibujos! Es un estilo de indiepop de verano mezcla de setentas, europop y noventas. El video me encanta. Fácil y bonita, casi todas sus canciones son así.

TAUMATAWHAKATANGIHANGAKOAUAUOTAMATEATURIPUKAPAPIKIMAUNGAHORONUKUPOKAIWHENUAKITANATAHU

This picture is from the album "El más y el menos"(from 1977 and soon I'll write about the whole thing) has always been for me an odd example of romanticism. Yes, is just the name of a little place "away from everywhere". But, is the longest name of in the world!. Since this album has so many errors I decided it to check it out and yes, it was true.

After a brief search i found a more modern picture of the same sign and even a photo from a different one from 2006.

This 85 letters name belongs to a hill somewhere in the south of Hawke Bay in New Zeland. I'm thinking about how you call people that eventually could be born in that place.

By the way the translation of the sign is:

"The place where Tamatea, the man with the big knees, who slid, climbed and swalloed mountains, known as landeater, played his flute to his loved one".

That's love , man!

THE ROMANS AND EMPIRE

Of the three movie magazines i use to collect Empire is the only one i still can buy. The other two: Neon and Cinefantastique are gone (the first one went the way of the dodo many years ago and the second can only be read nowadays online).

Empire is celebrating his 20th Aniversary and from the last issue (#245) i wanna take something I find very interesting that actually has more to do with universal history then with movies but since it's a part from the article for next year film Centurion, directed by Nick Marshall (I liked his 2002 wolfmen movie Dog Soldiers) and starring Michael Fassbender (Inglorious Basterds) and Olga Kurylenko (Quantum of Solace) i guess has a very good reason to appear in the twenty year old british magazine.

It's about a hundred trivia facts related to the Roman Empire. I'll give you some, the rest you can read by yourself, my fellow guelylanders.

#12 As well as hosting gladiatorial fights, the Colosseum put on live sex shows.

#15 Romans considered small penises beautiful. Large ones were mocked.

#30 Roman law forms the basis of most land law in Europe.

#33 Forty per cent of the population were slaves.

#36 A runaway slave was a criminal -Technicaly they'd stolen property: themselves.

#44 Romans invented the ice pop.

#45 They also invented toothpaste, which contained vinegar, honey, rock salt and spikenard (a type of pink flower).

#46 Girls got married at 14. their fathers chose the groom.

#81 By the middle of the first century BC, no-one could remember what the deity Furrina was goddess of. But the romans carried on worshipping her, just in case.

#82 Rome's sacred flame was tended by six vestal virgins.

#83 If a condemmed criminal saw one, he'd be pardoned.

#88 During the festival of Ceres, foxes were released in the Circus Maximus with torches tied to their tails, running around in panic until eventually burned to death.

#89 During the Lupercalia, a festival of fertility, women who wanted to get pregnant would line up to be whipped by young boys smeared in goat- and dog- blood.

#92 Hadrian (117-138 AD) was the first bearded Emperor.

#93 Romans were typically shaved by slaves, but Julius Caesar had his facial hairs plucked out with tweezers.

ALBUM ANIMALES Y SUS CRIAS

This one is from 1971 by Almex S.A. and after so many years, i can see that looking at it now i still remember a lot. I had my first notice about many animals here. And, as a kid was fascinated for some of it illustrations. And there are 352 of them. Take this one for example:

Somehow the out of focus background (didn't know those words at the time) made the eagle very realistic as it if was a photo.

And these dolphins with their crystal blue color seemed of a purity that i couldn't stop watching (well, i was like five years old at the time).

Then we have the jaguar (i didn't like the cubes not facing the viewer) that actually looks like a male but it was cool never the less.

I leave you with a selection of pages that i hope you like, enjoy and perhaps remember.

Many of the illustrations were drawn based in photos and some of them composed. I've seen for example two different photos of the leopard and her cube in two separate and unrelated pictures. So, the artist just mixed them in order to have two cool animals together in one nice picture.

Ojo con el cuy!