ABOUT GUELYLAND

"One of the smallest , independent kingdoms in the ciberuniverse. Nothing fancy. Population? Just me, myself and my jaguars, my movies and my books (and, at this very moment, YOU). Hided and secret like Skull Island or Opar, the ancients in Guelyland use to read the scrools of a minor god called Voor-Hes.
Most of the treasures of Guelyland are made of paper, plastic and vinyl.Guelyland dreams with expanding in deep more then in surface. The music of Nik Kershaw has been heard here. There are apes, lots of apes in Guelyland. Woody Allen and Bob Hope visit it quite often. Here we love books (the Kingdoms Library is both celebrated and secret) Here we are atheists but very tolerant and think of god a bit too often and much. Guelyland is, the stuff my dreams are made of..."

PEOPLE WITH TASTE. YOU CAN BE ONE OF THEM!!

Saturday, February 28, 2009

FIGURAS IMPOSIBLES!

Un tesarato, mi figura imposible favorita!


Una variante de Escher


Techo o piso?


Se sentaran justos cuando se amisten?


Thursday, February 26, 2009

MOVIE COINCIDENCES















Coincidences are noticed a posteriori. Somewhere around last december i bought the DVD of The Darjeeling Limited (Wes Anders, 2007) and i just watched it this morning. After that i took my lunch and put another disc. This time The Virgin Suicides (Sofia Coppola,2000) purchased a couple of days ago. So here is the coincidence, second unit director Roman Coppola and checking the credits Jason Schwartzman is in both movies. Come on, where's little Jason in Sofia's film? I know him well. I check the "making of" on the DVD and yes is that little cool guy son of a mob or something. I didn't know he was part of the "Coppola Clan" (Sofia's cousin).
So? Not big deal. But this happens to me all the time actually. Like five days ago i watched Phase IV (Saul Bass,1974) and after that The Island of Dr. Moreau (Don Taylor, 1977) and in both was Nigel Davenport, and actor i didn't recognice before (only his very british names)And the list goes on. Do i watch a lot of films? Yes. Kind of. But i don't select them for the secondary actor's in them. I bet this happen to many people and there is no mistery to it because it's just a coincidence. I'm sure there a more coincidences that we never notice happening around our lives and much, much more "non coincidences" if there's such a thing. I just can't avoid to getting a happy kick out of it when it happens and i see it.

P.D. But as they say, twice is an accident, three is a coincidence.

MERE EXCUSES!

Click to enlarge (you don't need any excuse to do it!)

Wednesday, February 25, 2009

THIS SPINAL TAP


One of my favorite comedies of all time is This Is Spinal Tap (Rob Reiner,1984)
Here three little scenes that can explain what i mean. Just for fun.

*BLOOD IS ACTUALLY RED

[Marty compliments Nigel on his tee shirt]

Nigel Tufnel: You like this?

Marty DiBergi: It's very nice. It looks like hollow wood.

Nigel Tufnel: This is my exact inner structure, done in a tee shirt. Exactly medically accurate. See?

Marty DiBergi: So in other words if we were to take all your flesh and blood...

Nigel Tufnel: Take them off. This is what you'd see.

Marty DiBergi: It wouldn't be green though.

[Nigel points at Marty]
Nigel Tufnel: It is green. You see how your blood looks blue.

Marty DiBergi: Yeah, well that's just the vein. That's the color of the vein. The blood is actually red.

Nigel Tufnel: Oh then, maybe it's not green. Anyway this is what I sleep in sometimes.

*TO ELEVEN!

Nigel Tufnel: The numbers all go to eleven. Look, right across the board, eleven, eleven, eleven and...

Marty DiBergi: Oh, I see. And most amps go up to ten?

Nigel Tufnel: Exactly.

Marty DiBergi: Does that mean it's louder? Is it any louder?

Nigel Tufnel: Well, it's one louder, isn't it? It's not ten. You see, most blokes, you know, will be playing at ten. You're on ten here, all the way up, all the way up, all the way up, you're on ten on your guitar. Where can you go from there? Where?

Marty DiBergi: I don't know.

Nigel Tufnel: Nowhere. Exactly. What we do is, if we need that extra push over the cliff, you know what we do?

Marty DiBergi: Put it up to eleven.

Nigel Tufnel: Eleven. Exactly. One louder.

Marty DiBergi: Why don't you just make ten louder and make ten be the top number and make that a little louder?

Nigel Tufnel: [pause] These go to eleven.

*THE MISTERY OF THE EXPLODING DRUMMERS

Marty DiBergi: Now, during the Flower People period, who was your drummer?
David St. Hubbins: Stumpy's replacement, Peter James Bond. He also died in mysterious circumstances. We were playing a, uh...

Nigel Tufnel: ...Festival.

David St. Hubbins: Jazz blues festival. Where was that?

Nigel Tufnel: Blues jazz, really.

Derek Smalls: Blues jazz festival. Misnamed.

Nigel Tufnel: It was in the Isle of, uh...

David St. Hubbins: Isle of Lucy. The Isle of Lucy jazz and blues festival.

Nigel Tufnel: And, uh, it was tragic, really. He exploded on stage.

Derek Smalls: Just like that.

David St. Hubbins: He just went up.

Nigel Tufnel: He just was like a flash of green light... And that was it. Nothing was left.

David St. Hubbins: Look at his face.

Nigel Tufnel: Well, there was...

David St. Hubbins: It's true, this really did happen.

Nigel Tufnel: It's true. There was a little green globule on his drum seat.

David St. Hubbins: Like a stain, really.

Nigel Tufnel: It was more of a stain than a globule, actually.

David St. Hubbins: You know, several, you know, dozens of people spontaneously combust each year. It's just not really widely reported.

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

LOOKING AHEAD, THE DAY YOU DIE.


"Now I've justified this to myself in all sorts of ways. It wasn't a big deal, just a minor betrayal. Or we'd outgrown each other, you know, that sort of thing. But let's face it, I ripped them off - my so called mates. But Begbie, I couldn't give a shit about him. And Sick Boy, well he'd done the same to me, if he'd only thought of it first. And Spud, well okay, I felt sorry for Spud - he never hurt anybody. So why did I do it? I could offer a million answers - all false. The truth is that I'm a bad person. But, that's gonna change - I'm going to change. This is the last of that sort of thing. Now I'm cleaning up and I'm moving on, going straight and choosing life. I'm looking forward to it already. I'm gonna be just like you. The job, the family, the fucking big television. The washing machine, the car, the compact disc and electric tin opener, good health, low cholesterol, dental insurance, mortgage, starter home, leisure wear, luggage, three piece suite, DIY, game shows, junk food, children, walks in the park, nine to five, good at golf, washing the car, choice of sweaters, family Christmas, indexed pension, tax exemption, clearing gutters, getting by, looking ahead, the day you die."
(Irvine Welsh,Trainspotting)

Monday, February 23, 2009

TARZAN MEETS SPANKY!


And here we have two guys i own hours and hours of joy. I wish i was behind that camera during that day. Good old Weissmuller in his prime and the great Spanky! Gotta wait for the end of the mounth to buy the new release of Our Gang on DVD. Haven't seen those kids in ages!

Saturday, February 21, 2009

EXTRA BIG ASS TACO. NOW WITH MORE MOLECULES!


(Click the pic for funny details)

Okey, now picture this scenario:
"As the 21st century began, human evolution was at a turning point. Natural selection, the process by which the strongest, the smartest, the fastest, reproduced in greater numbers than the rest, a process which had once favored the noblest traits of man, now began to favor different traits. Most science fiction of the day predicted a future that was more civilized and more intelligent. But as time went on, things seemed to be heading in the opposite direction. A dumbing down. How did this happen? Evolution does not necessarily reward intelligence. With no natural predators to thin the herd, it began to simply reward those who reproduced the most, and left the intelligent to become an endangered species."

Now this is a scene from the movie Idiocracy (Mike "Beaves and Butt-Head" Judge.2006) an overlooked seriously funny satire of our future, where a woman is trying to get some food from some automatic food machine (Carl's Jr. computer):

Carl's Jr. Computer: Enjoy your EXTRA BIG ASS FRIES!

Woman at Carl's Jr.: You didn't give me no fries, I got an empty box.

Carl's Jr. Computer: Would you like another EXTRA BIG ASS FRIES?

Woman at Carl's Jr.: I said I didn't get any!

Carl's Jr. Computer: Thank you! Your account has been charged. Your balance is zero. Please come back when you can afford to make a purchase.

Woman at Carl's Jr.: What? NO!
[She hits the machine. An alarm goes off, and a sign appears on the computer saying "Carl's Jr. Frowns Upon Vandalism."]

Carl's Jr. Computer: I'm sorry you're having trouble. I'm sorry you're having trouble.

Woman at Carl's Jr.: My kids are starvin'!

Carl's Jr. Computer: [the woman kicks the computer, and it sprays a chloroform-like substance in her face, knocking her out] This should help you calm down. Please come back when you can afford to make a purchase. Your kids are starving. Carl's Jr. believes that no child should go hungry. You are an unfit mother. Your children will be placed in the custody of Carl's Jr. Carl's Jr...”Fuck You, I'm Eating."
[Joe approaches the computer]

Carl's Jr. Computer: Welcome to Carl's Jr. Would you like to try our EXTRA BIG ASS TACO? Now with more MOLECULES!

THAT BODY WAS MEANT FOR BEGETTIN' CHILDREN: IT WAS NOT MEANT FOR THE LUST OF MEN!


The Rev. Powell (Bob Mitchum) ridiculous cruelty and Willa's (Shelley Winters) resignated frustration are superbly shown in this scene of the dreamy tale The Night Of The Hunter, from 1955. The only one movie directed by Charles Laughton.
In some paralel universe people is enjoying more masterpieces from the big man. At least we got this one.

Willa Harper: [Willa and Harry's wedding night] Harry?

Rev. Harry Powell: I was praying.

Willa Harper: I'm sorry. I didn't know. I thought...

Rev. Harry Powell: You thought, Willa, that the moment you walked in that door, I'd start to paw at you in that abominable way that men are supposed to do on their wedding night. Ain't that right, now?

Willa Harper: No, no, no.

Rev. Harry Powell: I think it's time we made one thing perfectly clear, Willa. Marriage to me represents the blending of two spirits in the sight of Heaven. Get up, Willa.

Willa Harper: Harry, what...?

Rev. Harry Powell: Get up. Now go look at yourself yonder in that mirror. Do as I say. Look at yourself. What do you see, girl? You see the body of a woman, the temple of creation and motherhood. You see the flesh of Eve that man since Adam has profaned. That body was meant for begettin' children. It was not meant for the lust of men! Do you want more children, Willa?

Willa Harper: I... no.

Rev. Harry Powell: It's the business of this marriage to mind the two you have now. Not to beget more. Alright, you can get in bed now. Stop shivering.

Willa Harper: [praying] Help me to be clean, so I can be what Harry wants me to be.

TINTIN Y SPIELBERG

Acaso Spielberg esté pensando que no quiere que sus actores envejezcan como Harrison en Indiana Jones por eso para su película de Tin Tin usará motion capture (como en Polar Express) pero a un nivel mucho más evolucionado y sólo para los personajes de Herge. 2011, un poquito temprano para ir revetando el popcorn pero ganas no faltan!
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0983193/

Thursday, February 19, 2009

IDEITAS

Están ahí, a mi alcance y con toda su magia. Cuando quiera escapar iré allá a mis tres tomos de Las Mil noches y Una Noche.
(25/2/98)

Prefiero las cosas baratas a las que lo parecen.
(20/10/97)

Prefiero el conocimiento a la información.
(2/6/98)

Nada tiene sinó la importancia que uno le otorga.
(17/10/00)

Su amor era como el colegio al que se extraña pero al que sinceramente jamás se volvería.
(28/10/01)

Cuando la belleza del alma tiene fallas, la del cuerpo ayuda (y viceversa).
(24/12/00)

PROFESSOR OF ARCHEOLOGY. EXPERT ON THE OCCULT AND HOW DOES ONE SAY IT? OBTAINER OF RARE ANTIQUITIES.


Major Eaton: Doctor Jones, we've heard a lot about you.

Indiana: Have you.

Major Eaton: Professor of Archeology. Expert on the occult and how does one say it? Obtainer of rare antiquities.

Indiana: That's one way of saying it. Why don't you sit down you'll be more comfortable.

Colonel Musgrove: Yes, you're a man of many talents.

Major Eaton: Now, you studied under Professor Ravenwood at the University of Chicago.

Indiana: Yes, I did.

Major Eaton: You have no idea of his present whereabouts?

Indiana: Only rumors really. Somewhere in Asia, I think. I haven't really spoken to him in 10 years. We were friends once but we had a bit of a falling out, I'm afraid.

Colonel Musgrove: Now, Doctor Jones, you must understand that this is all completely confidential.

Indiana: I understand.

Colonel Musgrove: Yesterday afternoon our European section intercepted a German communique that was sent from Cairo to Berlin.

Major Eaton: You see for the last two years the Nazis have had teams of archeologists running around the world looking for all sorts of religious artifacts. Hitler's gone nuts on the subject. He's crazy. He's obsessed with the occult. And right now, apparently, there is some kind of German archeological dig going on in the desert outside Cairo.

Colonel Musgrove: Now we have some information here but we can't make anything out of it and maybe you can. "Tannis development proceeding. Acquire headpeace, Staff of Ra, Abner Ravenwood, US."

Indiana: The Nazis have discovered Tannis!

Major Eaton: Now just what does that mean to you? Tannis.

Indiana: Tannis is one of the possible resting places of the Lost Ark.

Colonel Musgrove: The Lost Ark?

Indiana: Yeah, the Ark of the Covenant. The chest the Hebrews used to carry the 10 Commandments around in.

Major Eaton: Alright, now, what do you mean the 10 Commandments, you talking about THE 10 Commandments?

Indiana: Yes, the actual 10 Commandments the original stone tablets that Moses came down out of Mount Horeb and smashed if you believe in that sort of thing. Didn't you guys ever go to Sunday School? Look, the Hebrews took the broken pieces and put them into the Ark. When they settled in Cainan they put the Ark in a place called The Temple of Solomon where it stayed for many years. 'Till all of the sudden, whoosh, it was gone.

Major Eaton: Where?

Indiana: Nobody knows where or when.

(Raiders of the Lost Ark. Steven Spielberg,1981)

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

GEORGE CARLIN ON RELIGION. If you are a believer don't read this cos you might be offended. Actually, you should read it because ideas must be tested.


Good old George always was honest with himself and with us. His ideas on religion might sound irreverent for the believers but if you think deeper then that and with an open and funny mind you can see the true behind them. Here some droppings of his mind about this subject that always intrigue me no matter the years that pass.And don't worry cos if god exists...Ops, Georgie!At least you were frank!

I've begun worshipping the Sun for a number of reasons. First of all, unlike some other gods I could mention, I can see the Sun. It's there for me every day. And the things it brings me are quite apparent all the time: heat, light, food, a lovely day. There's no mystery, no one asks for money, I don't have to dress up, and there's no boring pageantry. And interestingly enough, I have found that the prayers I offer to the sun and the prayers I formerly offered to God are all answered at about the same 50-percent rate.
(From, Brain Droppings)

Here's another question I've been pondering -- what is all this shit about angels? Have you heard this? Three out of four people belive in angels. Are you fucking stupid? Has everybody lost their mind? You know what I think it is? I think it's a massive, collective, psychotic chemical flashback for all the drugs smoked, swallowed, shot, and absorbed rectally by all Americans from 1960 to 1990. Thirty years of street drugs will get you some fucking angels, my friend!
What about Goblins, huh? Doesn't anybody belive in Goblins? You never hear about this. Except on Halloween and then it's all negative shit. And what about Zombies? You never hear from Zombies! That's the trouble with Zombies, they're unreliable! I say if you're going to go for the Angel bullshit you might as well go for the Zombie package as well.
(From, You Are All Diseased)

I don't have any beliefs or allegiances. I don't believe in this country, I don't believe in religion, or a god, and I don't believe in all these man-made institutional ideas.
(George Carlin, quoted from Reuters / Variety "Notable Quotes" for April 25, 2001)

I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.
(From, Brain Droppings)


The two big mistakes were the belief in a sky god -- that there's a man in the sky with 10 things he doesn't want you to do and you'll burn for a long time if you do them -- and private property, which I think is at the core of our failure as a species. That's the source of my indignations, my dissatisfactions, however it comes out on the stage. I feel betrayed by the people I'm part of, these creatures, these magnificent creatures.


In the Bullshit Department, a businessman can't hold a candle to a clergyman. 'Cause I gotta tell you the truth, folks. When it comes to bullshit, big-time, major league bullshit, you have to stand in awe of the all-time champion of false promises and exaggerated claims: religion. No contest. No contest. Religion. Religion easily has the greatest bullshit story ever told.
Think about it. Religion has actually convinced people that there's an invisible man -- living in the sky -- who watches everything you do, every minute of every day. And the invisible man has a special list of ten things he does not want you to do. And if you do any of these ten things, he has a special place, full of fire and smoke and burning and torture and anguish, where he will send you to live and suffer and burn and choke and scream and cry forever and ever 'til the end of time!
But He loves you.
He loves you, and He needs money! He always needs money! He's all-powerful, all-perfect, all-knowing, and all-wise, somehow just can't handle money! Religion takes in billions of dollars, they pay no taxes, and they always need a little more. Now, you talk about a good bullshit story. Holy Shit!
(From,Politically Incorrect, May 29, 1997)

You know who I pray to? Joe Pesci. Joe Pesci. Two reasons; first of all, I think he's a good actor. Okay. To me, that counts. Second; he looks like a guy who can get things done. Joe Pesci doesn't fuck around. Doesn't fuck around. In fact, Joe Pesci came through on a couple of things that God was having trouble with. For years I asked God to do something about my noisy neighbor with the barking dog. Joe Pesci straightened that cock-sucker out with one visit.
I noticed that of all the prayers I used to offer to God, and all the prayers that I now offer to Joe Pesci, are being answered at about the same 50 percent rate. Half the time I get what I want. Half the time I don't. Same as God 50-50. Same as the four leaf clover, the horse shoe, the rabbit's foot, and the wishing well. Same as the mojo man. Same as the voodoo lady who tells your fortune by squeezing the goat's testicles. It's all the same; 50-50. So just pick your superstitions, sit back, make a wish and enjoy yourself.
And for those of you that look to the Bible for it's literary qualities and moral lessons; I got a couple other stories I might like to recommend for you. You might enjoy The Three Little Pigs. That's a good one. It has a nice happy ending. Then there's Little Red Riding Hood. Although it does have that one X-rated part where the Big Bad Wolf actually eats the grandmother. Which I didn't care for, by the way. And finally, I've always drawn a great deal of moral comfort from Humpty Dumpty. The part I liked best: "and all the king's horses, and all the king's men couldn't put Humpty together again." That's because there is no Humpty Dumpty, and there is no God. None. Not one. Never was. No God.


If this is the best God can do, I'm not impressed.
(From, Napalm & Silly Putty,2001)

GEORGE CARLIN (1937-2008)



Here some quotes of my favorite stand-up comedian!

Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that.

Swimming is not a sport. Swimming is a way to keep from drowning. That’s just common sense!

A house is just a place to keep your stuff while you go out and get more stuff.
Have you ever noticed that their stuff is shit and your shit is stuff?

I wanna live. I don’t wanna die. That’s the whole meaning of life: Not dying! I figured that shit out by myself in the third grade.

If it’s true that our species is alone in the universe, then I’d have to say that the universe aimed rather low and settled for very little.

No one knows what’s next, but everybody does it.

The very existence of flamethrowers proves that sometime, somewhere, someone said to themselves, “You know, I want to set those people over there on fire, but I’m just not close enough to get the job done.”

Just when I discovered the meaning of life, they changed it.

If it requires a uniform, it’s a worthless endeavor.

If you live long enough, sooner or later everybody you know has cancer.


I put a dollar in a change machine. Nothing changed.

Ever notice that anyone going slower than you is an idiot, but anyone going faster is a maniac?

Isn’t it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do “practice”?

Have you noticed that most of the women who are against abortion are women you wouldn’t want to fuck in the first place? There’s such balance in nature.


Catholic — which I was until I reached the age of reason.

Here’s a bumper sticker I’d like to see: “We are the proud parents of a child who’s self-esteem is sufficient that he doesn’t need us promoting his minor scholastic achievements on the back of our car.”

I love and treasure individuals as I meet them; I loathe and despise the groups they identify with and belong to.

I’ve never seen a homeless guy with a bottle of Gatorade.





One great thing about getting old is that you can get out of all sorts of social obligations just by
saying you’re too tired.

In America, anyone can become president. That’s the problem.

“One thing leads to another”? Not always. Sometimes one thing leads to the same thing. Ask an addict.

The future will soon be a thing of the past.

The planet is fine. The people are fucked.

The only good thing ever to come out of religion was the music.

Thou shalt keep thy religion to thyself.

Just think, right now as you read this, some guy somewhere is gettin’ ready to hang himself.

“Meow” means “woof” in cat.

Most people with low self-esteem have earned it.

Most people work just hard enough not to get fired and get paid just enough money not to quit.

“No comment” is a comment.

So far, this is the oldest I’ve been.

Instead of warning pregnant women not to drink, I think female alcoholics ought to be told not to fuck.

I think I am, therefore, I am. I think.

Capitalism tries for a delicate balance: It attempts to work things out so that everyone gets just enough stuff to keep them from getting violent and trying to take other people’s stuff.

I don’t have a fear of heights. I do, however, have a fear of falling from heights.
What was the best thing before sliced bread?

May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house.

Life is a zero sum game.

Somehow I enjoy watching people suffer.

It isn’t fair: the caterpillar does all the work, and the butterfly gets all the glory.

FUNNY HOW?


Ray Liotta is Henry Hill, Tommy DeVito is the scary Joe Pesci in this unforgetable scene from Scorsese's Goodfellas(1990).

(After Pesci cracks a joke that the fellas celebrate at the bar, Liotta makes his now legendary comment but litlle Pesci wants to be sure about what he really meant)

Henry Hill: You're a pistol, you're really funny. You're really funny.

Tommy DeVito: What do you mean I'm funny?

Henry Hill: It's funny, you know. It's a good story, it's funny, you're a funny guy.
[laughs]

Tommy DeVito: what do you mean, you mean the way I talk? What?

Henry Hill: It's just, you know. You're just funny, it's... funny, the way you tell the story and everything.

Tommy DeVito: [it becomes quiet] Funny how? What's funny about it?

Anthony Stabile: Tommy no, You got it all wrong.

Tommy DeVito: Oh, oh, Anthony. He's a big boy, he knows what he said. What did ya say? Funny how?

Henry Hill: Jus...

Tommy DeVito: What?

Henry Hill: Just... ya know... you're funny.

Tommy DeVito: You mean, let me understand this cause, ya know maybe it's me, I'm a little fucked up maybe, but I'm funny how, I mean funny like I'm a clown, I amuse you? I make you laugh, I'm here to fuckin' amuse you? What do you mean funny, funny how? How am I funny?

Henry Hill: Just... you know, how you tell the story, what?

Tommy DeVito: No, no, I don't know, you said it. How do I know? You said I'm funny. How the fuck am I funny, what the fuck is so funny about me? Tell me, tell me what's funny!
Henry Hill: [long pause] Get the fuck out of here, Tommy! Tommy DeVito: [everyone laughs] Ya motherfucker! I almost had him, I almost had him. Ya stuttering prick ya. Frankie, was he shaking? I wonder about you sometimes, Henry. You may fold under questioning.

(Pesci is a guy you better have on your side or not at all!)

Tuesday, February 17, 2009

EL AMIGO AUSENTE


Cuando era chico y me la pasaba leyendo libros de animales, habían muchos que llamaban mi atención y ciertas especies se convertían en especie de amigos a los que leía, buscaba y encontraba en diferentes libros. Un día fuí a la casa de tío Carlín, que me enteré había comprado la colección completa de Bruguera Enciclopedia de la Vida Animal (15 Volúmenes,Bruguera,1974)y me dijo que si bien no me prestaba ningún tomo, podía en cambio leer allí cuanto quisiera. Y me pegaba unas encerradas de dias en el cuarto leyendo y leyendo hasta que me dí con un viejo amigo, de esos que digo que buscaba siempre (para esto, mi mejor amigo y hasta ahora es, y siempre será, el jaguar(Panthera Onca), que quede bien claro). Bueno y encontré a mi querido tigre de Tasmania ó lobo marsupial ó tilacino (Thylacinus cynocephalus). Todo bien hasta ahí, una bella ilustración a toda página y en color y unas fotos en blanco y negro que me eran familiares. Lo raro fue que pensé que ó debía habérmela pasado leyendo libros de animales viejos ó reeditados ó en realidad no habría prestado mucha atención a mis lecturas porque como quien lee con sorpresa un obtuario en el periódico, el libro lo mencionaba como una especie extinguida. Leí y releí y sí, no se había visto un solo ejemplar vivo desde que el que vivía en el zoológico de Hobart en Tasmania en 1936 murió. Sólo recientemente di con la información de que el lobo marsupial tuvo el estatus de especie amenazada hasta el año 1986. Ya que los protocolos internacionales exigen que cualquier animal del cual no se hayan encontrado ejemplares en cincuenta años sea considerado extinto. Y las lecturas én casa de tío Carlín fueron a mediados o finales de los años setenta. Y mis lecturas previas en mi favorita Vida Animal (Abril Editores,1972) o en la edición de 1965 de la Enciclopedia Temática de la oficina de mi papá no registraban la terrible extinción. Recuerdo que me quedé triste y frío. Que por largos instantes no dejé de contemplar la figura de el "perro rayado", de ese amigo al que daba literalmente por vivito y coleando. Sentí casi en carne propia como el ser humano puede ser tan egoista y estúpido, como no merecemos el mundo en que vivimos y que poco lo queremos en realidad.

Monday, February 16, 2009

LABYRINTH


One of the movies Diana and me watch over and over again is Labyrinth(Jim Henson, 1986). Fantasy, The Muppet Master Henson, Jennifer Connelly and Bowie.What else canone ask for a movie! Years ago I was too lazy to buy the the soundtrack on vinyl and even if i still regret it, at least today i found the mp3, so i am happy to share it with you, visitor of Guelyland, as a token of my friendship. Here's the link:

http://rapidshare.com/files/196543004/1986_-_Labyrinth.rar

P.D. If someone know how to make a direct link please teach me how.

MUCHACHONES


Esta foto me parece simplemente cool. Dos de los tipos más "fichos" del entre siglo en la flor de la juventud. Juro que yo estaba en el medio pero no salí porque me estaba amarrando los zapatos!

Monday, February 9, 2009

TROYA


La vez pasada mi hija tenía una tarea sobre la novela "La familia Robinson suiza" y se acordo que teníamos en casa la versión de Disney (Ken Annakin,1960). La vimos y dió un buen examen. Hoy estaba estudiando la guerra de Troya y me preguntó si teniamos alguna película sobre eso. Casi dije que no, pero recordé que por hay teníamos el DVD (que con tantos que compro, nunca había visto). Así que la vimos y créo que la tendré que agregar a mi lista de películas que la crítica zamaqueó pero que al final me terminaron gustando(la vez pasada escribiendo sobre Congo hice una y acabo de recordar que olvidé incluir La Máquina del Tiempo (Simon Wells,2002)).
El director Wolfgang Petersen que desde Das Boot(1982) me cayó rebien (pasando por la Historia Sin Fin (1984), In the Line of Fire(1993)y Air Force One(1997)que digan lo que digan me gustó también)nos muestra la historia de Troya como "debería" haber pasado,sin milagros, ni divinidades. Y bueno, me pareció espectacular pero sobretodo me agradó ver veteranos como Peter O´Toole(Príamo), Brian Cox(Agamemnon) y Julie Christie(Tetis)dándole clase a la película. Qué desperdiciado el talento de O'Toole durante tantos años. Ojalá que hicieran La Odisea(aunque dudo que Hollywood le de la chance a Sean Bean, a quién lo subestiman como para darle un papel de héroe protagónico)y los rumores indican que le darían el papel a Brad Pitt, más taquillero que Bean, bajo la dirección de George Miller(aunque no el de Mad Max sinó un homónimo). La película saldría para el 2012 así que falta todavía un buen poco de tiempo. Bueno aquí Patroclo es sólo "primo" de Aquiles(Brad Pitt)y Helena(Diane Kruger) no es raptada, ni violada ,sinó que está enamorada de Paris(Orlando Bloom). Pero total quien puede decir que Homero fue fiel a la historia. Cúal Homero , en todo caso!
Ojalá que le sigan dando estas tareas a mi hija que así le encontramos un nuevo uso a los DVDs. Que aunque las películas no suelen ser tradicionalmente muy fieles a la Historia ni a la Literatura me parece una alternativa a leer el libro en dos horas.Dicho sea de paso a Diana(mi hija)le encantó la película que a sus doce años ya sabe efectos especiales y sangre de mentira.

P.D. En el pequeño papel de Polidora aparece la sueca Siri Svegler cantante de la banda Guido Sol.

Sunday, February 8, 2009

AN EYE IN FLAMES OF INK


(Untitled by Sirli Vaht)
A cosmic eye in flames looking us. But, is it a real eye? Or just his representation. Is it the eye of a burning Fenix? The expression is calm, the shape is femenine. Is easy to imagine the beauty of the rest by staring at the detail that is shown. Or is it perhaps a close mirror reflection that is saying what we are. Eyes in details are usually introspective selfportraits that are trying to find out about ourselves by the means of contemplation while we stare no one else but us, as if it was someone else.

EPIFANIA

(Clica en la foto para ampliarla)
HELNWEIN. Epifania.

El redentor ha llegado y lo vienen a visitar. La madre con mezcla de humildad y orgullo lo sujeta como si este ya casi pudiera estar de pie. El pequeño nos mira directamente a los ojos con pueril inteligencia. Los altivos visitantes lo observan como queriendo confirmar que están frente al esperado Salvador.

TALISMANES

Si, existen cosas a las que le damos un valor mas allá del funcional. Y los llamaremos talismanes, fetiches, reliquias, recuerdos, dependiendo de cómo nos aproximemos a ellos.Cosas cuya presencia nos imprime cierta seguridad. Dicen que todo empieza con el peluche que el bebe aferra, cuando la mamá no está, porque se siente solo y tiene miedo. Hay un poema de Borges en donde lo van a fusilar y el coge un volumen de Emerson para que lo acompañe a su destino final. Por ahí tengo un pedacito de cemento, no del muro de Berlín, sinó de una vereda de mi colegio mucho anterior a la reunificación de Alemania. Una antología ecuatoriana de Las Mil y Una Noches que me acompaña desde que tuve 7 años. Dejé muchas cosas en Perú cuando vine a Suecia pero de algunos libros y mi colección de casets no me pude soltar.Me consuelo pensando que mi hogar es el mundo y que ellas existen, si bien lejos, y descansan esperándome a que las vuelva a aferrar. Objetos inanimados que tienen un valor exclusivo para nosotros. Queremos sentirnos acompañados a veces por estas cosas que nos reflejan de algún modo recordándonos quienes fuimos o somos.

Saturday, February 7, 2009

EL HUMOR DE BORGES


Jorge Luis Borges(1899-1986)

Durante la dictadura militar alguien le comenta a Borges que el general Galtieri, presidente de la República en ese momento, ha confesado que una de sus mayores ambiciones es seguir el camino de Perón y parecerse a él. “¡Caramba! -interrumpe Borges- es imposible imaginarse una aspiración más modesta“.


En una entrevista, en Roma, un periodista trataba de poner en aprietos a Jorge Luis Borges. Como no lo lograba, finalmente probó con algo que le pareció más provocativo: “¿En su país todavía hay caníbales?”
- “Ya no - contestó aquél -, nos los comimos a todos.”


En plena Guerra de las Malvinas, opinó que “la Argentina e Inglaterra parecen dos pelados peleándose por un peine” y que “las islas habría que regalárselas a Bolivia para que tenga salida al mar“.


Borges charla con Antonio Carrizo, en un bar. Por la radio del local se anuncia un tango con letra de León Benarós, amigo de Borges. El locutor propone escucharlo y el escritor acepta. Cuando el tango termina, Carrizo le pregunta qué le pareció. Borges mueve la cabeza y dictamina, muy preocupado: “Esto le pasa a Benarós por juntarse con peronistas“.


El poeta Eduardo González Lanuza, uno de los introductores del ultraísmo en la Argentina y gran amigo de Borges, descubre a éste en Florida y Corrientes, solo, con su bastón, esperando para poder cruzar. Lo toca y le dice: “Borges, soy González Lanuza“.
El vuelve la cabeza y, después de unos segundos, contesta: “Es probable“.


Un joven poeta se acerca a Borges en la calle. Deja en manos del escritor su primer libro.Borges agradece y le pregunta cuál es el título. “Con la patria adentro“, responde el joven. -”Pero qué incomodidad, amigo, qué incomodidad”.


El escritor argentino Héctor Bianciotti recuerda una de las tantas salidas elegantes de Borges, cuando le incomodaban los halagos de la gente: Ocurre en París, en un estudio de televisión.
-”¿Usted se da cuenta de que es uno de los grandes escritores del siglo?“, lo interrogan.
-”Es que este“, evalúa Borges, “ha sido un siglo muy mediocre“.


Una mañana de octubre de 1967, Borges está al frente de su clase de literatura inglesa. Un estudiante entra y lo interrumpe para anunciar la muerte del Che Guevara y la inmediata suspensión de las clases para rendirle un homenaje . Borges contesta que el homenaje seguramente puede esperar. Clima tenso. El estudiante insiste: “Tiene que ser ahora y usted se va“. Borges no se resigna y grita: “No me voy nada. Y si usted es tan guapo, venga a sacarme del escritorio“. El estudiante amenaza con cortar la luz. “He tomado la precaución de ser ciego“, contesta Borges.


Una revista de actualidad reúne a Borges con el director técnico César Luis Menotti. “Qué raro, ¿no? Un hombre inteligente y se empeña en hablar de fútbol todo el tiempo“, comenta Borges más tarde.


En 1983, un periodista de La Nación pide a Borges su opinión sobre la Guerra de Malvinas. “Absurda“, define Borges. “Estoy triste, muy triste. Mandaron a esos pobres muchachos de veinte años a morir al sur. Tener veinte años y pelear contra soldados veteranos es algo atroz, inconcebible. Solamente en el crucero General Belgrano murieron cientos. Claro que los militares dirán que al lado de los desaparecidos esa cifra no es nada, pero no creo que les convenga ese argumento. No, no les va a convenir…”


En 1975, a los 99 años, muere Leonor Acevedo de Borges, madre del escritor. En el velorio, una mujer da el pésame a Borges y comenta: “Peeero… pobre Leonorcita, morirse tan poquito antes de cumplir los 100 años. Si hubiera esperado un poquito más…“.
Borges le dice: “Veo, señora, que es usted devota del sistema decimal“.


Borges y un escritor joven debatiendo sobre literatura y otros temas. El escritor joven le dice: “Y bueno, en política no vamos a estar de acuerdo, maestro, porque yo soy peronista“. Borges contestò: “Còmo que no? Yo tambièn soy ciego“.


En 1977 Borges escribió un cuento para La Nación: "24 de agosto de 1983", donde el propio Borges se soñaba a sí mismo suicidándose en esa preciso fecha, el día en que cumplía 84 años. A medida que se acercaba la fecha de su cumpleaños, apareció mucha gente preocupada por el posible traslado de la ficción a la realidad. Borges entonces comentó:"¿Qué hago? ¿Me comporto como un caballero y convierto en realidad esa ficción para no defraudar a esa gente? ¿O me hago el distraído y dejo pasar las cosas?


Yo me acuerdo que hace años, cuando todavía existían los bares automáticos, ibamos con Xul Solar a uno que quedaba en Córdoba y Callao. A Xul le gustaba experimentar y como era un inventor nato, y habíá inventado cosas espléndidas, trataba de hallar combinaciones posibles entre los alimentos. Asi, llegó a mezclar café negro con salsa de tomate (verdaderamente repugnante) o sardinas con chocolate (atroz). Probábamos juntos esas mezclas y él mismo comprendía que eran incompatibles los elementos mezclados. Yo creo que las buenas combinaciones ya fueron inventadas y que nada podrá superar al café con leche (su inventor debe haber sido un ser excepcional) que es riquisimo y que es la combinación por excelencia.

Thursday, February 5, 2009

MI ABUELO ARTEMIO

Murió el '87. Hoy, quizá nadie lo sabe muy bien realmente, hubiera cumplido 95 años. Seguro que ya se habría muerto de todas maneras. Mi abuelo Artemio, fue un hombre bueno. Por lo menos un abuelo bueno. Lo tuve sólo hasta que cumplí 22. Siempre me quiso y estuvo dispuesto a darme lo que tenía y que no tenía que ser necesariamente mucho pero si suficiente. De el recuerdo el aprecio por las cosas limpias, el afán de sencillez, algún rasgo suyo en mi cara. Para mi es suficiente. Suficiente para recordarlo. Para querer recordarlo. Para no querer olvidarlo.
El padre de mi madre fue un hombre pobre, simple, trabajador, que cojeaba y vivía solo. Créo que mi madre lo quiso pero ya no lo aguantó en sus años finales. Este abuelo me solía dar propinas, invitarme a almorzar, amarrarme la corbata, contarme su vida. A veces me aburría pero esto no impedía que apreciara su buena voluntad. Lloré cuando murió. Nunca se me había muerto nadie antes. Nadie así despues. Suena a excusa pero no trato de escribir sobre él tanto como sobre mi memoria de él, sobre el hecho de que casi nadie lo recuerda (quizá porque no existe un motivo reciente). Acaso esta sea la última generación que se percate de su pasada existencia. No existen muchos retratos suyos.
Fue una persona común y buena. No hay mucho que contar de él. No créo riqueza, ni belleza. Acaso el éxito no fue su mejor amigo. Nunca me comento un libro (aunque si me dió plata para comprarlos), ni una película.
Siempre andaba con pañuelo o chalina, a la manera de los compadritos argentinos, de los cantantes de tangos, modas de su época. Personalmente, no recuerdo nada que pueda juzgar malo en él. Por el contrario recuerdo siempre, y gracias a él, que una persona no necesita ser extraordinaria para ser un buen ejemplo, un modelo a seguir.

(20/10/1997)

FOR THOSE WHO HAVE A BROAD IDEA OF GOD


Steven Weinberg, Nobel prize winner of physics(1979), has an interesting comment:
"Some people have views of God that are so broad and flexible that it is inevitable that they will find God wherever they look at him. One hears it said that 'God is the ultimate' or 'God is our better nature' or 'God is the universe.' of course, like any other word, the word 'God' can be given any meaning we like. If you want to say that 'God is energy', then you can find God in a lump of coal."

Weinberg,S.(1993). Dreams of a Final Theory.London:Vintage.

Wednesday, February 4, 2009

FREAKS



This is one of the most famous and beloved cult movies ever. If you don't know it i gonna borrow the entrance from "The Film Snob's Dictionary"(1) to enlight you properly. By the way this is a little good book that if you don't know you should get as well.

"Genuinely aberrant studio film from 1932, directed by Tod Browning for MGM, that featured malformed sideshow folk (including pinheads, Siamese twins, and an armless, legless man known as "the Living Torso")as the cast in a plotline about a traveling circus whose comely trapeze artist meanly manipulates an amorous midget, only to get her gruesome comeuppance. Renowned among cultural-studies dorks for the number of "pop" references it produced, including the Ramones' "Gabba gabba hey!" cry (an aproximation of the affronted freaks' chant) and bill griffith's Zippy the Pinhead cartoon character (based in part on Schlitze, the male pinhead who padded around in a housedress)"

Tod Browning is, yes the same guy who gave us the first Dracula with Lugosi and The Unknown with Lon Chaney, the unforgettable "man of the thousand faces".

(1)David Kamp with Lawrence Levi, Broadway Books,2006

Tuesday, February 3, 2009

THE LAMED WUFNIKS



This is a text of the infinite argentinian writer Jorge Luis Borges(1899-1986). It gives me, somehow, hope.

"There are on earth, and always were, thirty-six righteous men whose mission is to justify the world before God. They are the Lamed Wufniks. They do not know each other and are very poor. If a man comes to the knowledge that he is a Lamed Wufnik, he immediately dies and somebody else, perhaps in another part of the world, takes his place. Lamed Wufniks are, without knowing it, the secret pillars of the universe. Were it not for them, God would annihilate the whole of mankind. Unawares, they are our saviors.
This mystical belief of the Jews can be found in the works of Max Brod. Its remote origin may be the eighteenth chapter of Genesis, where we read this verse: "And the Lord said, If I find in Sodom fifty righteous within the city, then I will spare all the place for their sakes." The Moslems have an analogous personage in the Kutb."

Jorge Luis Borges (The book of imaginary beings,Kier,1967)

Sunday, February 1, 2009

GUILTY PLEASURES?


Yes! That's how they call the bad movies we use to,ignoring the critics, like. They are not even redeemed with the patch label of "cult movie". I have a few: The Avengers Movie, Lost in Space, Godzilla(Roland Emmerich), What Dreams May Come, Revelation(Stuart Urban), City of Angels, Blue Brothers 2000, Cats & Dogs. Did i say few?
Well today and without any shame or further ado I will add another tittle to my least of beloved turkeys. The name of this one is Congo (1995). I'm just a sucker for apes in movies(But, make no mistake, I have to make clear anyway that i hate Konga from 1961). So, if you wanna have some talking gorillas, jungle with exploding volcanoes(they are never there for nothing, you know?) and african lost cities during the 90's, don't think twice and get this one. They say is bad and maybe it is but then, as Pia use to say "So? kill me for that!"

WATCH ME, WATCHING YOU WATCHING ME

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